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Fighter McWarrior
Fighter McWarrior, better known as Fighter, is Black Mage's best friend and a master swordsman. A champion of Drownball. He is notable for his childish naïvety. Fighter is a warrior specializing in swords and master of The Twelve Schools of Vargus-do Zodiac-Style Swordplay (Zodiac Kenshido for short). He has an almost single-minded sword fixation, as well as a short attention span. Fighter is one of the four Light Warriors and, of the four, he is the most stupid. Like the other Light Warriors, he has the ability to survive massive amount of slapstick injuries (getting beaten up by a giant, large explosions, etc.), and he ends up on the receiving end of them more than the others. Role in the Comic Fighter is very naive and remains blissfully unaware of the fact that the Light Warriors are, viewed objectively, a group of homicidal maniacs roaming the country. Instead, he honestly believes himself and the others to be honorable and just. He is so lacking of intelligence that, at times, he lowers the intelligence of others around him with his sheer incompetence. Further, Fighter's thoughts often trail off into territories of "nerd knowledge," such as Star Trek, Transformers and video games. Apart from his intellectual shortcomings, Fighter also suffers from severe arachnophobia and goes into a gibbering panic, even when he's only told a spider is near or on him. Fighter had trained in Vargus' School (Fighter's Camp '86) at least since the age of six. At a young age, he was expelled from the school for failing to correctly answer the question, "How many schools of Zodiac Kenshido are there?" After leaving the camp, he was about to "give up the blade and embrace his] true calling in life — short order cook!" before literally running into Black Mage. Fighter immediately bonded with Black Mage, despite Black Mage's multiple attempts to stab and kill him (all of which fail miserably either due to Fighter's seeming invincibility or Black Mage's stupidity). He seems to be completely unaware of Black Mage's feelings of hate towards him and, in fact, has often put himself in great personal danger to help his "best buddy" (for example, during the battle with Lich von Vampire), and on occasion avenge him (for example, when it was believed that Black Mage was killed by a giant falling on him). His protectiveness of Black Mage even extends to being willing to threaten Thief and Red Mage Statscowski when the latter openly discussed killing Black Mage within earshot, stating that friends must protect each other and that Black Mage is his best friend. He is the creator of the Sword-Chucks, a weapon consisting of two swords attached by a chain extending between the two hilts — a combination of twin swords and a nun-chuck. At first, this is an obvious joke weapon — not only would using it likely lead to the amputation of one's own hands, since nunchucks are wielded holding their ends, but the user would also be putting themselves in severe danger of being hit by rapidly-moving blades. Nevertheless, Fighter successfully used Sword-Chucks to fight Kary, the Fiend of Fire, to a standstill at no harm to himself. He had even successfully developed Sword-Chucks once before, but the timespan in which this happened was obliterated by the wizard, Sarda, who altered reality in order to be able to eat his dinner without preparing it first. His Sword-Chucks have not been seen since the incident, but this could be simply because no enemy has required the amount of power they provide. He did appear to be swinging them around, however, just before his class change, possibly CAUSING his class change, but he may have just been juggling and wielding four swords at once, as he once decided he should learn to do. It has been strongly suggested that Fighter may actually be more intelligent than he seems. Fighter sometimes has surprising random bursts of intellect; for example, he was able to read the Overcomplicatian (a dead language whose name perfectly describes it) writing on the entrance to Gurgu Volcano, discussed quantum theory and how it "describes how subatomic particles can pop into existence at random" and occasionally reveals moments of deep contemplation in his inner monologue. Further, he offers an amazingly insightful analysis of Black Mage's character and also knows a thing or two about airships. He is also shown to be able to, at times, pick out the glaring flaws in the plans of others, especially those of Black Mage. The least that can be said is that Fighter's mind is more complex than it first appears; in fact, it has been said that "Fighter is the smartest of the Light Warriors. He's just very stupid about it." In one instance, Fighter went so far as to suggest that his stupidity was all just an act, and that he is manipulating the rest of the party for his own evil ends. In the Castle of Ordeals, Fighter faced the representation of Sloth, who told him he had to stop accepting his sword fighting abilities as given and actively improve on them. He also had to learn to use his mind, as well as his blades; upon this revelation, Fighter immediately cut the Ordeal to pieces because his brain told him "this would be faster." Afterward, Fighter changed his class to a Knight, gaining the ability to whirl his swords at very high speeds (so high as to create sonic booms), as well as the ability to block attacks from hitting his comrades. Apparently, his intelligence has also increased, as he makes insightful comments much more frequently now. As a drawback, he has still retained his naïve nature. Fighter suddenly experienced a large increase in intelligence after Black Mage attempted to kill him by stabbing him in the head and using the Skrakoom lightning spell after White Mage kissed Fighter for sorting her life out for her. This, according to Thief, "stabbed the stupid out of him", though Red Mage guessed that the lightning stimulated a part of his brain that he never used. This enabled him to know where the air orb was, but Black Mage stabbed him again (liking him even less when he was in "smart mode) before he could tell Thief and Red Mage. Fighter's super intelligence then tried to move into the part of his brain was his sword skills were, leading to the parts of knowledge fighting, and the sword skills won out. Later in the comic, when the Light Warriors, Dark Warriors and the Other Warriors vote on teams, Fighter is somehow a member of every team. To add to this, one team, "The Fighting Fighters" has three Fighters in it, along with Bikke, as well as a team known as The Auxiliary League of Fighters which presumably consisted entirely of him. When the teams break apart, Fighter standoffs against the other teams. However, since every other member besides himself has left or lost interest, Fighter stands alone, fighting himself. After the Four Fiends were rekilled, White Mage was injured by Black Mage. This caused Fighter to put friendship behind and fight his BFF. However, Black Mage realized that their fight would last forever and solve nothing, due to their equal power, and told Fighter to go away and help White Mage. Black Mage then stabbed Fighter through the head and through the groin with two black energy tendrils. Sarda has since used some sort of cure spell to revive him, to BM's dismay. Relationships with other Characters *Black Mage Evilwizardington: Fighter truly believes that he and Black Mage are Friends, even suggesting that he would kill Thief and Red Mage if they harmed him. He also takes Black Mage's constant insults and murder attempts as a sign of their friendship. However, after White Mage is injured, Fighter turns on Black Mage in an attempt to stop him from drawing closer to White Mage. *Black Belt: Fighter and Black Belt were good friends. *Princess Sara: Fighter had a crush on her in the early years of the strip, before she ended up disappearing. *Thief: Fighter likes to think that they are friends, but Thief considers him to be an idiot. *Red Mage: Fighter and Red Mage are rarely seen interacting together, although Red Mage is the only one who doesn't think Fighter is an idiot. *White Mage: Fighter seems to have a growing crush on White Mage, which she is doing nothing to deny. Trivia * The representation of his cardinal sin, Sloth, is a Giant Sloth/Gargoyle hybrid. * One of Fighter's first quests was to find the legendary "Armor of Invincibility." Thanks to a mishearing, he eventually received Matoya's "Armoire of Invincibility", which he carried until the weight became too great and he was crushed by it, surviving only due to the fact that the bottom of the Armoire of Invincibility was made from particle board. The Armoire of Invincibilty was then placed in a summoning materia (actually a Hypercube) and later used to defeat Vilbert von Vampire. It hasn't been seen or used since then. * Fighter once made guest comics for 8-Bit Theater starring himself while Brian Clevinger was on vacation. The quality of the comics reflected his personality. He also keeps a journal of the Light Warriors' adventures, written in a naive and childlike style, which the readers have seen three times so far and once wrote a haiku of love for Princess Sara, which said, "I like swords and I like Sword-Chucks, but I like you very, very much." He has been known to make typos such as typing the symbol "!" but instead typing the number 1. * According to Thief, Fighter's contract states that the insurance on Fighter pays double if Fighter dies by heroic act. (Prompting Black Mage to attempt to hug Thief.) * Fighter seems to have mastered every Zodiac Kenshido technique, including the Ram Form (on which Black Mage comments that it is nigh-impossible to do). This technique consists mainly of "breaking your opponent's equipment with your head before he breaks your head with his equipment." The incredible thickness of Fighter's skull is the only factor that allowed him to master such a technique. * As a child, Fighter lived near power lines and was fond of eating paint chips, which offers a possible explanation for his lack of mental capability. * Fighter is the only person in the group whom Sarda likes, or at least does not think of as a jerk, even giving him candy at one point. * In Episode 749 he uses "lol cats speak," saying "He mus be in 'Ur' base, killing 'Ur' dudes." The Many Looks of Fighter Image:Fighter Walk.jpg|In the Earlier Comics Image:Fighter Drag.gif|In Drag Image:Dwarf-Fighter.png|Dwarf Disguise Image:Fighter2.gif|After His Class Change See Also Fighter McWarrior Appearances Category:Characters